Fighting Temptations
by ALWfan
Summary: Follows Jax and Courtney as they deal with their bet, feelings and past relationshsips.
1. Irresistable

**Alil bit 'o background**

Everything on the show is as is, the bet has been made, they are a month into the bet, Courtney is still unaware of Jasons lies. Enjoy and please review...and be gentle :)

Courtney sighed contentedly against the soft feather cushion under her cheek; she felt the heat of the sun warm her back, as she lay face down on one of the lounge chairs outlining the pool. Paradise! She could definitely get used to this! As part of his ploy to "seduce" her, Jasper "Jax" Jacks, had once again spirited her off to a remote Private Island somewhere in the Caribbean, with a population of about 200, most of which were employees of the sprawling breathtaking estate they were staying in. 

Yes, shed been on Sonny's Island with Jason before, but the glaring difference here was, they weren't running, hiding or healing from anything or anyone, she hadn't a care in the world, such a foreign, yet incredibly satisfying feeling. She felt as if she could actually breathe for the first time in a long time, she could relax and even…have _fun_? Yup! She could definitely get used to this. 

She had to admit, Jax had impeccable taste, and he was very good-looking, definitely not her tastes, but he was visually appealing, albeit overshadowed by arrogance and over-the-top self-confidence, bridled with an unsavory playboy complex. He was also kind of sweet, in his own chauvinistic self-serving way. It was amazing how he could make her blood boil one minute, and have her smiling like a fool the next, she was tempted to think that underneath it all, there was a half decent guy, who'd simply been hurt once too many times. But even with that, she kept an eye on him, he was determined to get her into bed, and win their bet, and she was determined to win her 10 million dollars for her foundation, but for the past month, somehow everything had gotten all jumbled up, and she was having problems deciphering between his real feelings for her, and his brand of cheesy, grandiose charm, she couldn't afford to invest herself in this, and wind up getting hurt, and loosing the bet all at once, she was just trying to put the pieces of her life back together after her divorce from Jason and her heart could only take so much more, so she was going to play it safe, have fun and make Jax spend disgusting amounts of money on her, but put up enough of a wall between them so their feelings wont get involved. Her thoughts were invaded by the uncomfortable constriction of her bikini around her neck, there was no one around, why not take it off?   
  
"Jax!!!" She yelled out, making sure he was no where around; the silence that answered her assured her that he was still out playing golf. 

She reached behind her neck, and stripped of her bikini top, and soon fell into a blissful slumber, her nightmares replaced by dreams about nothing in particular for the first time in months.

* * *

Jax sauntered in the Patio, he hadn't seen Courtney all day, and he felt, dare he say, _excited_?...to see her. Ah there was no use denying it, she was incredibly beautiful, her feminine yet firm body made his mind go to very curious places, her blue eyes were mesmerizing, her hair was like silk, and she had a smile that could melt even the hardest of men. But what worried him, was that he knew it was far more than that, she had a sweet spirit, and that appealed to him even more than any of her physical attributes, although, her legs came in a very close second…sleek and sturdy, and she usually showed just enough of it that he sometimes wondered about the firmness of her thighs…

"Speak of the devil" he muttered softly to himself as he wandered upon her sleeping scantily clad glistening body sprawled seductively on one of the lounge chair, the infamous thighs looking as firm as he had imagined, not that he had thought too much about it . He would have given his arm and more to be that very chair at that very moment. 

He noticed her back was starting to redden, and a small bottle of suntan lotion lay conviniently on her side, if it asnt a sign from the heavens he didn know what was. He had to do it, he knew he would kick himself forever if he didn't;, plus he couldn't let her just burn in the sun, that would be most unkind!. He crouched slowly next to her, grabbing a bottle of suntan lotion, and squirting a generous amount on his hands, he softly rubbed the oil on her shoulders, making a trail down towards her lowed back. Her skin was soft yet her back was hard and lean. 

"Mmmmhhmmmmmmmmm…Jax….lower" she moaned lightly through her sleep 

Jax stifled the laughter that threatened to escape his lips, I guess Miss Unattached and Unaffected, was affected by him after all, even if only in her subconscious. Being the gentleman he was, he couldn't help but respect the ladies wishes, he made his way down her back, tracing the tattoo on her lower back lightly with his fingers, she was so damn sexy! 

Suddenly, he eyes shot open, and she looked sharply over her shoulder, then realized she was topless and lay back down. 

"Jasper Jacks! You have 5 seconds to get your grimy hands off my back, or I will break ALL your fingers!" she said sharply 

He backed away fighting laughter 

"What? I was just trying to help you, a few more minutes and you would have been roasted!" 

"Right! Off Course! How convenient for you! I mean really Jax, granted your methods of seduction are antiquated and inefficient, but resorting to pawing me in my sleep is quite low even for you!" Courtney said angrily as she searched for her bikini top with her hands while trying to shield herself from him 

"Pawing you! Ha! I was simply being a gentleman and protecting you from the sun..." 

"Gentleman? You wouldn't know the meaning of the word! A gentleman would have helped me find my bikini top by now, and excused himself instead of staring at me like I'm a piece of meat!" 

Jax finally erupted in laughter as he reached below her chair and handed her top. 

"Turn around!" she demanded 

Courtney put her top on, as she muttered several unflattering words about Jax, who much to annoyance was barely holding himself up through his laughter. 

"What in the world is so funny? She asked as she slipped her robe on. 

'Well" he began as he turned around to face her "You seem to claim my moves are…what was it? Antiquated and Inefficient, right? Yet, as I rubbed your back, the words "hmm Jax lower" seemed to have escaped your well guarded feelings for me." He replied smugly 

Courtney's cheeks grew red with embarrassment, and she stammered and stuttered as she made futile attempts to explain herself to Jax who stood there with a huge smile on his face. She finally gave up explaining and stomped away angrily screaming behind her 

"You are SO ANNOYING! Ugh!" 

She slammed the patio door behind her, and leaned back against the wall, still feeling the heat of his hands on her back…as a reluctan smile played on her lips, yes, he was incredibly brass and annoying, but so very good with his hands. She glanced through the doors in time to see him strip of his shirt, and dive into the pool…and an amazing body too, this was going to be a long two months!


	2. Bonding

**Chapter 2 - Bonding**

Vey sorry this took me forever, seriously the show is sooo good that its hard to trump it! So i apologize if this isnt very good...it def isnt as a result of a lack of inspiration.:)

Chapter 2

Courtney curled her toes into the smooth white sand, as the cool breeze whipped around her, wrapping her sarong around her legs. The sun was setting beautifully into the ocean; she had never seen anything more beautiful. She looked around for any sign of Jax, but he was no where in sight.

"'Where the heck is he?" she muttered to herself.

After the little episode this afternoon, she had given the silent treatment all day, declined his offer of a candle-lit dinner, and balked at his offer of a "long walk on the beach", seriously, how much more cliché, could he get?

It infuriated her even more, when he gave her that you-know-you-want-to smile of his, and laughed her protests off as he wandered out on his own, seemingly unaffected by her rejection. After stewing in her anger, and conjuring up numerous scenarios for a clean yet painful death for Jax for about an hour, she decided to settle down with a nice book and enjoy a nice quiet evening. Eventually, she admitted to herself that the book was boring, the quiet was driving her crazy, and she did miss the laughter and excitement Jax brought with him. She decided to wander aimlessly on the beach, and maybe shell "accidentally" bump into Jax, however it appeared that had proved futile as well.

With resignation and frustration, she started back towards the house, muttering to herself angrily on how Jax could just disappear, sure she told him to get lost, but she didn't actually think he _would_ get lost!

Sounds of uninhibited laughter coming from behind a cluster of trees to her right broke into her reverie, apparently through her haze she had neglected to notice a small group of people clustered around a small fire on the beach.

The sight that confronted her on her arrival shook Courtney to her core. Jax sat surrounded by about seven eager young children, eyes fixated on him, drinking in his every word. On his lap sat a little girl of about five, her dark curly head resting on his chest, with her thumb in her mouth. As he related a tale of one of his many adventures, she watched in awe as their eyes grew wide with excitement and anticipation, Jax's words taking them to places they had only dreamt of.

He noticed her presence, and winked at her, then proceeded to wrap up his tale, then shooing the reluctant and protesting children home, declaring it way past their bed time. He placed a tender kiss on the head of the little one on his lap; as he set her down to follow her brothers and sisters.

Once the children left, Courtney took a seat beside him on the log he had been sitting on.

'I see you decided to leave the house after all" he said with a smile. Courtney laughed and turned to face him.

"You were very good with them. They didn't even realize I was there, how did you do that?"

"Learnt from the best; my father, also, I do this every time I visit her, the children love it, so do I. A lot of them never get to leave this Island you know? I like to bring a little bit of the world to them; I guess I've gotten used to it. It also appears they find my company far more appealing than some do." He said teasingly

The lack of a witty comeback shocked him, and then he realized that eyes were glistening with tears. He placed a hand softly on her back

"What's wrong Courtney? Did I say something wrong?" he inquired softly. She shook her head and smiled through her tears to reassure him

"It's just...I remember when I was a kid, my mother would drag me to a family reunion at my grandmas every summer, I don't know why, she hated her whole family. But, anyways, wed go down to Virginia, and my whole family would be there. It was horrible, they're all so much alike, and they all hate each other. There'd be hours of fighting and arguing, and I always felt so different from all the kids. They'd all known each other so long that I was kinda like an outsider you know? Anyways, I hated it, but the last night, my grandma would gather all us kids around, and shed tell us stories of when she was little, and all the amazing things she went through. And just for that one moment, we were a family, bound together by these stories. I promised myself then, that I would carry on that tradition with my own kids. I always imagined that id share times like these with my family you know? me and my husband, and our kids, on the beach, sitting around a warm fire, sharing stories. Watching you just brought back those feelings and memories that's all".

A solitary tear stole its way down her cheek, and she quickly brushed it away.

"I'm such a mess!" she proclaimed

"No...No you're not" Jax said, as he rubbed her back slowly "Look, I'm sure there's a ;pt of joy in having kids of your own, but the bond between parents and their children isn't borne out of biology, its made from unconditional love, and kindness, and heart, and you have all those things Courtney, any child will be lucky to have you as their mother."

Courtney smiled and placed her palm softly against his smooth cheek and whispered softly

"You'd make an amazing father too".

Jax lowered his head slowly till he felt his lips touch hers; smooth and soft. His kiss was gentle yet probing, and sent chills down her spine, her breath caught in her chest and she responded with ardent fervor, as she ran her fingers through his hair. His arms snaked behind her and pulled her closer against him, till she was virtually sitting his lap crushed against his hard chest; she could feel his heart beating against hers.

A panicked voice coming towards them broke through the moment, and jarred them reluctantly from each other, Courtney nervously scooted off his lap in embarrassment and rubbed her palms nervously against each other. Jamal, a steward from the estate came into view, panting breathlessly.

"Ma'am, a lady called for you...Carly...she was crying, she said you had to come home right away....she said she's scared, and she needs you! She said I had to deliver the message right away ma'am"

A familiar jolt of panic cut through Courtney like a knife as both she and Jax hurried behind Jamal to the estate, she hoped it was simply a case of Carly overreacting as usual, but she felt a sinking unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach that just won't go away

Carly threw back another glass of scotch, and slammed the glass on Courtney's kitchen table, tears cascading down her cheeks unabashedly. She'd be damned if shed let Sam and her baby ruin the family she had fought so hard to keep together, no, shed die first


	3. Unraveling

Carly paced angrily in Courtney's apartment, she still couldn't believe it, and she never thought that Jason would lie to her, never! And now he had, she felt like her whole world was spinning out of control, that's why she had to fix it, make sure everything was okay; it was all up to her. All she had to do was fix Jason and Courtney's relationship, and Sam would be out of their lives for good, and everything would be back to normal. She heard a strong rap on Courtney's door...that should be Jason, he was just in time. She hurried to open the door to him; he hurried into the loft nervous and worried, just like she knew he would be, Carly fought back a knowing smile.

"What? What is it? What's the problem? You said something had happened to Courtney? Where is she?" he demanded as he looked around

Carly bit her lip nervously, her big eyes brimming with tears.

"There I no problem is there Carly? This is one of your plans right? Lure me here to the loft and play matchmaker?" he shook his head in anger "Why do you not ever know when to stop? Why do you continue to do this? All you do is hurt me and hurt Courtney, we are OVER Carly, Courtney and I are done! It doesn't matter, how much scheming or planning you do, its not going to change anything! Now you need to stop this...and you need to stop this now, or else..." his voice trailed off, and he stalked past her towards the door.

Carly reached out and grabbed his arm spinning him around. By now her tears had begun cascading down her cheeks.

"Or else what Jason? Can't you see what you've done? You've ruined all our lives with this stupid lie that you told, all because of Sam. Are you really expecting me to live across the hall, from that tramp, while you play house with her? Are you expecting Courtney to watch you prance around with Sam and her baby, what she wants most? You lied to me Jason! You lied to all of us. And now you're going to fix it. You wanted me back with Sonny? I'm back with Sonny! Now you have to wait here and tell Courtney to her face, that you lied, before she hears it from someone else, and tell her you're sorry, and you love her and want her back. So we can get Sam out of our lives and everything can be the way it was...please Jason." she finished pleadingly, grabbing on to his arm tightly.

He looked at her for what seemed like forever, and the shrugged her off his arm and proceeded towards the door. He reached for the knob, and the door swung upon to reveal Courtney on the other side.

Courtney looked from Carly' satisfied smirk to Jason' stony stare.

"What' going on here?" She asked, and then turned to Carly "You said there was trouble."

Carly turned to Jason "Yes, yes there is, why don't you tell her Jase, tell her what the "problem" is."

With that she sauntered out of the loft slamming the door behind her.

Courtney turned to Jason quizzically, "well Jason, what's going on?


	4. The Hole in her heart

Hi! Just want to thank everyone for reading, and all the reviews! I hope you enjoy the updates and I really appreciate it!

Courtney's ears were ringing. She knew someone was talking to her, she could hear faint muddled words, as if from far away but she couldn't make out what they were. Slowly everything seemed to merge together, the sofa seemed to melt into the ground and it seemed that the center table was moving, the room started to spin slowly. She squeezed her eyes shut, and grabbed her head, she kept trying to breathe but the air just wouldn't come in, her breathing deepened and quickened. The voices got louder, what was he saying? It couldn't be true! He couldn't possibly be saying this to her...it simply couldn't be true, he would never lie to her...he wouldn't EVER...Oh my god...

"Oh my god...Oh my god..." she whispered continuously to herself, as she stumbled forward and grabbed a hold of the couch for balance. She felt his hand reach out to steady her, the feel of his palm against her skin was like a hot iron, and she yanked her arm away forcefully and shoved him away from her angrily. She stood to face him full on, anger seething through her as tears clouded her eyes and spilled uncontrollably down her cheeks.

"Don't touch me! DON'T YOU EVER TOUCH ME AGAIN!" She screamed loudly

"Courtney please...let me explain. I did it for Michael and Ccarly, and the family, i didnt mean to hurt anyone, but it was what i had to do, and i cant be sorry..." Jason began as he proceeded towards her again

Was he trying to justify it? Was he really standing in front of her trying to justify the months of lying, while her heart broke into a million pieces? Her mind was reeling, and as if she was being controlled by some outside entity, she pulled her arm back and hit him across the face.

The impact of her punch sent him stumbling backwards, he touched his nose to his hand, and looked at his blood-stained fingers, and shook his head ever so slightly, like always did when he was disappointed at her.

"Was this some kind of payback Jason??" She demanded angrily as she brushed her tears away. "Was this because of the thing with Lorenzo?? Is this about Jax?? Is this about the miscarriage? You didn't have to do this to me! You didn't have to lie to me about the one thing I wanted most in the world! You could have just taken your gun out and shot me! That would have hurt less Jason...and for what? For...Sam??" She said the word Sam as if it were a dirty repugnant word.

"Did you really want a baby that badly? That you would gladly take on the girlfriend and child of your "boss", and lie to my face..."

"I could have had a baby!" He screamed, his eyes reddening with anger "I could be a father right now, we could be parents, we would be a family Courtney, if you hadn't..." his voice trialed off slowly, as he realized what he had been about to say, looking at the shock on her face he knew she realized it too. But he couldn't take it back, he didn't know if he wanted to take it back. He'd tried not to think about it that way, because he knew she had suffered through it and for it, but every time he would see a child, see Morgan, he would remember, and he thought, If only she had listened to him. He had tried to hide those feelings somewhere deep inside of him, so she would never know, so she wouldn't have to deal with the guilt and hurt more than she already had, but he had gotten so angry it just came out, now it was out there. Maybe it was for the best.

Courtney felt her heart sink to her feet and shatter to a million pieces. She knew it was her fault, she blamed herself everyday, but she had hoped he didn't blame her. She tried to get him to yell at her when she had first told him about the miscarriage, but he wouldn't, he said he didn't...and eventually she had allowed herself to believe it...but she was wrong. She shouldn't have gone...she knew it...she shouldn't have gone...she killed her own baby...

"That's not fair! I shouldn't have gone...I know...I didn't mean to...I loved her...I loved her..." she said in a low monotone voice, as if to no one in particular. A torrent of tears began again, as she put her hands to her mouth to stifle her sobs. He moved towards her, and put his hand on her arm, she looked up at him as if seeing him for the first time.

"Get out Jason...now" she whispered softly

He shook his head, and walked past her, out the door. Courtney felt like she couldn't breathe, she picked up a vase and slammed it angrily against the wall, as she sank to her floor her body wracking with each sob.

Jasper Jacks cupped his hand around the flickering flame on solitary candle on the table, causing it to die out. He looked at his watch, Courtney had told him to go ahead and shed be back to join him after she had dealt with Carly, that was four hours ago, it was midnight, and she most likely wasn't coming anymore. He feigned nonchalance, and quickly began to put everything away, no promises right? That was what he and Courtney had agreed on, then why did he feel so....hollow? He paused for a second, and took in the romantic dinner for two he had set for himself and Courtney that night. He had done everything himself, even the cooking. He got a chef friend of his in Philadelphia, to teach him, over the phone none the less, how to prepare the perfect Philly Cheese Steak, just the way she liked it. He had called the maid in, on her day off, at 9pm just to make sure the table was set perfectly. He didn't need this! She was just another girl right?? Once this stupid bet was over, he'd be done with her. If she wanted to be with Jason that was her loss...Jason....a scalding fury surged through him and with one hand he swept everything of the table.

A timid knock on his door brought him back to his sensibilities.

He preceded to the door, swinging it open to reveal a crying, soaking wet, Courtney.

"I killed my baby." She whispered hauntingly to him. There stood staring at each other for a few seconds, his heart breaking into a million pieces for her, and his mind cursing Jason for whatever he might have said to hurt her. As if at the same time, they started towards each other, and he gathered her into his arms like a little girl, lifting her off the ground, she rested her head in the crook of his neck and clung on to him tightly, and he carried her inside.


End file.
